Matthew Lovett blames the abuse he says he suffered at home and at school for an ill-fated carjacking attempt
By JASON NARK
(Originally published in the Courier Post)
Matthew Lovett said he only wanted to escape years of mental and physical torture he suffered at the hands of his peers.
Lovett didn't care where he went or how he got there, as long as it was far from Oaklyn.
Now the 19-year-old is surrounded by peers far worse than bullies, in a place where physical and mental escape is virtually impossible -- prison.
"I never thought things would turn out this way for me,' said a fidgety Lovett, dressed in khaki prison fatigues much too big for his lanky frame.
Lovett is serving a 10-year sentence for his involvement in a plot to shoot and kill youths in Oaklyn and random individuals elsewhere. In the early morning hours of July 6, 2003, Lovett, Cody Jackson and Christopher Olsonwere arrested in the borough after they attempted to carjack a Deptford man. The teens were carrying an arsenal of guns, swords and 2,000 rounds of ammunition.
In an interview with the Courier-Post Tuesday at the Albert C. Wagner Youth Correctional Facility, Lovett claims he never intended to kill anyone, and the guns were simply a prop carried over from his fantasies.
"There was not even a chance,' said Lovett, shaking his head at the notion. "We were stuck in a fantasy world. This wasn't real.'
Lovett said he can remember trouble at home as early as age 3.
"There was physical and mental abuse. There was never any family time,' said Lovett. "When I have children, I'll treat them like the angels they are.'
When his mother, Lorna, died in 1994, Lovett said his father slipped into a depression afterward.
Lovett's father, Ronald, said that he was never hard on his son, but admits that after high school he wanted him to make a decision on his future.
"He could have lived here for the rest of his life if he wanted to,' Ronald said. "I wanted him to make a decision on his future and I guess that pushed him over the edge.'
Ronald did admit that when his wife died it was hard on him. The younger Lovett said his relationship with his mother was traumatic.
"I'm not going to sugarcoat it, she was crazy. She treated me and my brother like animals,' said Lovett, pulling his long hair behind his ears. "I didn't get upset when my mom died, I just got scared.'
Lovett began keeping diaries immediately after his mother died, first in spiral notebooks and eventually in his beloved computer.
Life at school was immeasurably worse.
"From the time I waddled into preschool until the day I threw my cap at graduation, I went through hell,' he said.
Lovett said he never knew why he was picked on, and he rarely spoke of his ordeals to teachers and family.
At Collingswood High School, where he said he felt alienated by cliques, his agony culminated in a post-graduation party at Rowan University.
"I was having a good time and was even talkin
g to people and then the "group' showed up,' said Lovett of a group of popular students he said excluded him.
Lovett said he sat for the rest of the night, slumped against a pillar, pondering his 18 years.
"There wasn't one date, not one dance, not one party,' he said. "It was one of the saddest days of my life. I started slipping after that.'
Collingswood School District Superintendent James Bathurst declined to comment Tuesday.
Film escape
In the film The Matrix, the character Neo is an average office worker until he enters the virtual reality world of the "Matrix' where he is all-powerful.
Lovett said he and Jackson watched the movie often, sometimes three or four times in one day.
Lovett spent hours on the computer each day, where he, Jackson, and Olson networked with hundreds of friends online from all over the country.
"It was the flip side. I was somebody when I was on the computer,' he said. "I've helped a lot of people through suicide attempts. People came to me for advice.'
Lovett said movies like The Matrix and video games were a filter through which he could enact his violence.
"It didn't make me want to kill people, it made me want to be a rebel,' he said.
Lovett said his father, along with Jackson's parents, often frowned upon the teens spending so much time on the computer.
"If I wasn't online though, I was rotting away in front of the television or outside getting beat up,' he said. "Our parents hindered us, they never helped us.'
Judith Jackson, Cody's mother, said her son's artistic skills on the computer were encouraged in the household. Jackson even bought her son a new computer a month before the incident.
"Of course, we tried to keep track of what he was doing. But who would have thought he would have gotten involved with a self-proclaimed anti-Christ,' said Jackson.
Lovett said getting his computer back from the Camden County Prosecutor's Office is a top priority.
"My whole life is in that computer,' said Lovett.
"Forced to leave'
Lovett believed his father was going to kick him out of their apartment if he did not find a job after graduation. Although he did well academically his senior year, Lovett did not apply to college.
"I was forced to leave,' said Lovett. "I didn't care where we went. Cody wanted to go to Missouri but Pennsylvania would have done it for me.'
Lovett said none of the three knew how to drive and plans were vague as to how they would live beyond Oaklyn.
"I flunked out of driver's ed,' he said with a nervous chuckle.
Lovett said he still remembers seeing Mathew Rich's car speed away after he claims Cody pointed a handgun at the vehicle.
"It was the weirdest thing because I could see my house. After that we decided we should really rethink what we were doing,' he said.
In court statements, Jackson denied ever pointing a gun at Rich's car.
Before they reached Lovett's apartment, Oaklyn patrolman Charles Antrilli confronted the teens at gunpoint.
"He's probably the best cop I have ever met,' said Lovett. "I think he could sense that we weren't real criminals.'
After being brought back to the Oaklyn police station, Lovett was still naive about the magnitude of the incident.
"I didn't know walking on the streets with guns was a crime unless you used them,' he said. "I didn't know carjacking was a crime.'
Lovett said he heard and was concerned that Jackson and Olson both told authorities they feared him.
"Are they really my friends? Do they hate me?' he asked. "I miss my computer and my music but I miss Cody the most. We were always together.'
Olson and Jackson are serving four- and five-year terms in separate youth facilities. When Lovett first entered Albert C. Wagner three weeks ago, he felt as if he were back in school.
He said corrections officers regularly check on his well-being, but fear has kept him from going to the gymnasium or outdoor recreation areas.
"I keep to myself,' he said. "It really reminds me of school all too much. There are fights for the stupidest reasons.'
At the Camden County Jail, where Lovett spent more than nine months, he said he witnessed the murder of 65-year-old Joel Seidel at the hands of Marvin Lister, a former patient at the Ancora Psychiatric Hospital. Lovett said Lister spent his time yelling at other inmates, pacing the floors, and doing push-ups.'
"I really can't believe I lived through my time there,' Lovett said. "People here can't believe I came from Camden.'
Lovett said he was recently assigned to laundry duty but would rather work as a teacher's aide. Jail administrator John Robertshaw said Lovett's mobility in the prison work force depends on conduct and seniority. In the fall, Lovett will be able to take classes offered by Mercer County Community College, Robertshaw said.
Lovett's relationship with his father, Ronald, and brother, James, has improved while he's been in custody. James, who was born with a cleft palate and underwent 13 operations, has dropped out of high school and works at an electronics store in Oaklyn.
"I love him to death,' said Lovett, his eyes welling up. "He's the best thing in my life right now. My dad needs to let him find himself.'
Lovett said he plans to go to college and move upon his release, perhaps to Montana or Japan.
He said he's interested in computer graphics, but thinks he would make a great guidance counselor, believing his experiences could help bullies, victims and parents.
"Sometimes I would just be wishing, hoping and praying that someone would say hi to me. If someone says hi to you, you have to draw on that,' he said. "Sometimes I think if someone said hi to me, it would have changed everything.'
By JASON NARK
(Originally published in the Courier Post)
Matthew Lovett said he only wanted to escape years of mental and physical torture he suffered at the hands of his peers.
Lovett didn't care where he went or how he got there, as long as it was far from Oaklyn.
Now the 19-year-old is surrounded by peers far worse than bullies, in a place where physical and mental escape is virtually impossible -- prison.
"I never thought things would turn out this way for me,' said a fidgety Lovett, dressed in khaki prison fatigues much too big for his lanky frame.
Lovett is serving a 10-year sentence for his involvement in a plot to shoot and kill youths in Oaklyn and random individuals elsewhere. In the early morning hours of July 6, 2003, Lovett, Cody Jackson and Christopher Olsonwere arrested in the borough after they attempted to carjack a Deptford man. The teens were carrying an arsenal of guns, swords and 2,000 rounds of ammunition.
In an interview with the Courier-Post Tuesday at the Albert C. Wagner Youth Correctional Facility, Lovett claims he never intended to kill anyone, and the guns were simply a prop carried over from his fantasies.
"There was not even a chance,' said Lovett, shaking his head at the notion. "We were stuck in a fantasy world. This wasn't real.'
Lovett said he can remember trouble at home as early as age 3.
"There was physical and mental abuse. There was never any family time,' said Lovett. "When I have children, I'll treat them like the angels they are.'
When his mother, Lorna, died in 1994, Lovett said his father slipped into a depression afterward.
Lovett's father, Ronald, said that he was never hard on his son, but admits that after high school he wanted him to make a decision on his future.
"He could have lived here for the rest of his life if he wanted to,' Ronald said. "I wanted him to make a decision on his future and I guess that pushed him over the edge.'
Ronald did admit that when his wife died it was hard on him. The younger Lovett said his relationship with his mother was traumatic.
"I'm not going to sugarcoat it, she was crazy. She treated me and my brother like animals,' said Lovett, pulling his long hair behind his ears. "I didn't get upset when my mom died, I just got scared.'
Lovett began keeping diaries immediately after his mother died, first in spiral notebooks and eventually in his beloved computer.
Life at school was immeasurably worse.
"From the time I waddled into preschool until the day I threw my cap at graduation, I went through hell,' he said.
Lovett said he never knew why he was picked on, and he rarely spoke of his ordeals to teachers and family.
At Collingswood High School, where he said he felt alienated by cliques, his agony culminated in a post-graduation party at Rowan University.
"I was having a good time and was even talkin
g to people and then the "group' showed up,' said Lovett of a group of popular students he said excluded him.
Lovett said he sat for the rest of the night, slumped against a pillar, pondering his 18 years.
"There wasn't one date, not one dance, not one party,' he said. "It was one of the saddest days of my life. I started slipping after that.'
Collingswood School District Superintendent James Bathurst declined to comment Tuesday.
Film escape
In the film The Matrix, the character Neo is an average office worker until he enters the virtual reality world of the "Matrix' where he is all-powerful.
Lovett said he and Jackson watched the movie often, sometimes three or four times in one day.
Lovett spent hours on the computer each day, where he, Jackson, and Olson networked with hundreds of friends online from all over the country.
"It was the flip side. I was somebody when I was on the computer,' he said. "I've helped a lot of people through suicide attempts. People came to me for advice.'
Lovett said movies like The Matrix and video games were a filter through which he could enact his violence.
"It didn't make me want to kill people, it made me want to be a rebel,' he said.
Lovett said his father, along with Jackson's parents, often frowned upon the teens spending so much time on the computer.
"If I wasn't online though, I was rotting away in front of the television or outside getting beat up,' he said. "Our parents hindered us, they never helped us.'
Judith Jackson, Cody's mother, said her son's artistic skills on the computer were encouraged in the household. Jackson even bought her son a new computer a month before the incident.
"Of course, we tried to keep track of what he was doing. But who would have thought he would have gotten involved with a self-proclaimed anti-Christ,' said Jackson.
Lovett said getting his computer back from the Camden County Prosecutor's Office is a top priority.
"My whole life is in that computer,' said Lovett.
"Forced to leave'
Lovett believed his father was going to kick him out of their apartment if he did not find a job after graduation. Although he did well academically his senior year, Lovett did not apply to college.
"I was forced to leave,' said Lovett. "I didn't care where we went. Cody wanted to go to Missouri but Pennsylvania would have done it for me.'
Lovett said none of the three knew how to drive and plans were vague as to how they would live beyond Oaklyn.
"I flunked out of driver's ed,' he said with a nervous chuckle.
Lovett said he still remembers seeing Mathew Rich's car speed away after he claims Cody pointed a handgun at the vehicle.
"It was the weirdest thing because I could see my house. After that we decided we should really rethink what we were doing,' he said.
In court statements, Jackson denied ever pointing a gun at Rich's car.
Before they reached Lovett's apartment, Oaklyn patrolman Charles Antrilli confronted the teens at gunpoint.
"He's probably the best cop I have ever met,' said Lovett. "I think he could sense that we weren't real criminals.'
After being brought back to the Oaklyn police station, Lovett was still naive about the magnitude of the incident.
"I didn't know walking on the streets with guns was a crime unless you used them,' he said. "I didn't know carjacking was a crime.'
Lovett said he heard and was concerned that Jackson and Olson both told authorities they feared him.
"Are they really my friends? Do they hate me?' he asked. "I miss my computer and my music but I miss Cody the most. We were always together.'
Olson and Jackson are serving four- and five-year terms in separate youth facilities. When Lovett first entered Albert C. Wagner three weeks ago, he felt as if he were back in school.
He said corrections officers regularly check on his well-being, but fear has kept him from going to the gymnasium or outdoor recreation areas.
"I keep to myself,' he said. "It really reminds me of school all too much. There are fights for the stupidest reasons.'
At the Camden County Jail, where Lovett spent more than nine months, he said he witnessed the murder of 65-year-old Joel Seidel at the hands of Marvin Lister, a former patient at the Ancora Psychiatric Hospital. Lovett said Lister spent his time yelling at other inmates, pacing the floors, and doing push-ups.'
"I really can't believe I lived through my time there,' Lovett said. "People here can't believe I came from Camden.'
Lovett said he was recently assigned to laundry duty but would rather work as a teacher's aide. Jail administrator John Robertshaw said Lovett's mobility in the prison work force depends on conduct and seniority. In the fall, Lovett will be able to take classes offered by Mercer County Community College, Robertshaw said.
Lovett's relationship with his father, Ronald, and brother, James, has improved while he's been in custody. James, who was born with a cleft palate and underwent 13 operations, has dropped out of high school and works at an electronics store in Oaklyn.
"I love him to death,' said Lovett, his eyes welling up. "He's the best thing in my life right now. My dad needs to let him find himself.'
Lovett said he plans to go to college and move upon his release, perhaps to Montana or Japan.
He said he's interested in computer graphics, but thinks he would make a great guidance counselor, believing his experiences could help bullies, victims and parents.
"Sometimes I would just be wishing, hoping and praying that someone would say hi to me. If someone says hi to you, you have to draw on that,' he said. "Sometimes I think if someone said hi to me, it would have changed everything.'
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